My baby goes to school TOMORROW!

Blogging has been proven to be therapeutic. This is why I'm blogging tonight. My little Esme is starting kindergarten tomorrow. I'm so excited for her and so sad for me. As difficult as mothering can be and as cranky as I sometimes get I love my girls and LOVE being with them. I've known I was going to struggle with letting her go and now I'm standing in the middle of that bridge! This is dedicated to my true love, Esme!

I wanted Esme more than I ever wanted anything else. I'd go crying into Edward's arms and tell him how much I wanted a baby and he'd pat my back and tell me later. I guess we know who got her way in the end! ;) And I'm sure no one ever loved their baby more than I loved and adored my little Esme! She was the most beautiful baby I'd ever seen and an absolute pleasure to take care of!

Then she grew and approached that darling age of discovery, smiles, crawling, and so much loving interaction. I was in heaven and I knew it!

Then came the trouble and the independence. I didn't know what I was supposed to do and it was a huge time of learning for me. Honestly it was a hard time for me, but she taught me so much. Isn't she darling!

Every little discovery was so exciting and life just looked brand new when I glanced through her sparkling hazel eyes!

We taught her well!

And re-enforced it!

And taught her all about being a big sister. Honestly, Esme was a tremendous helper! She took care of me when I was pregnant and sick. I'd lay on the couch and she'd bring me a water bottle from the fridge or the diaper and wipes so I could change her. Such a little thing, yet so grown up!


She's been a mother-in-training since Alice was born.

Now she loves to feed Renesmee and fetching things for me and give Renesmee her pacifier if she wakes up crying. The other day she even took it upon herself to put a fresh diaper on Renesmee!

This is one of my all time favorite photographs of her. She wore these glasses all the time and I LOVED it!

She, of course, loved princesses and pink and anything girlie!

She was given a princess notebook by my good friends Matt & Jen and since then she hasn't stopped writing!

Hooray for sisters!

She just got bigger and more beautiful!

Have you ever seen such a beautiful child?

I love you, Esme!

Esme has struggled with anxiety since just before my Utah trip. She really didn't want me to go. She started having stomach aches and such. She didn't want to go to Primary any more or even stay with her beloved Grandma while Edward and I went out. We've prayed a lot together and talked a lot about going to school. She got really upset the first time we went to the school, but each time has gotten better. Tonight Edward gave her a father's blessing. I am incredibly grateful for the priesthood in my home!

I could tell she was attentive to what Edward was saying. Her eyes were closed and arms folded the whole time.

This is the joy of the restored gospel; having faith in Jesus Christ and receiving his help through times that are hard for us. Going to school was a true challenge for Esme, but she wasn't alone. Her loving Father in Heaven was with her and helped her overcome her anxiety.